Be Anxious about Something, Anything

In the April 8 New York Times, Mathilde Ross, senior staff psychiatrist at Boston University Health Services, wrote an essay titled, “Anxious Parents Are the Ones Who Need Help.”  In the essay, Ross declared that next fall will be a “record-breaking season for anxiety on campus.” Ross continues, “I’m talking about the parents. The kids are mostly fine.”

Ross describes today’s parents as "suffering from anxiety about anxiety, which is much more serious than anxiety. It’s self-fulfilling and not easily soothed by logic or evidence, such as the knowledge that most everyone adjusts to college just fine.”

She recalls earlier years when parents called, anxious about their students, and she would reassure them that situational anxiety is normal and time-limited, parents would be satisfied. End of conversation. Not so today. “Anxiety about anxiety has gotten so bad that some parents actually worry if their student isn’t anxious.” Ross points out.

I think I have situational anxiety down to an art form.

Take Monday’s eclipse. I typically avoid looking directly at the sun, so why was I so anxious about it on Monday? Did I look at it before I put on my eclipse sunglasses? How would I know if that one sideways glance was too much and too long? Well, I’d go blind in three days. Why did my screen look fuzzy on Wednesday morning? Is this the start of eclipse blindness? I wondered as I took off my new glasses with their new-to-me progressive lenses. I refused to read the article on “How to tell if you have eye damage after viewing the eclipse.” And if I store those eclipse glasses properly, I can use them for the next total eclipse; otherwise, I should remove them from the living room sideboard and toss them in the trash. All that anxiousness for 2.5 hours.

I am not alone in my practice of the anxious art. Even in casual conversations, I hear a lot of situational anxiety from people about these dark days in which we live. We’re not easily soothed as much as we are easily stirred to anxiety about, well, everything and anything, and maybe nothing at all.

Dark days and anxiety are not new for those who belong to the kingdom of light. The Apostle Paul, likely an expert on situational anxiety, experienced beatings, imprisonments, riots, labors, sleepless nights, and hunger (see 2 Corinthians 6:5). In Women's Bible Study this week, we talked about those sleepless nights and hunger on board Paul's harrowing voyage to Rome in Acts 27 and 28.

On that wreck of a ship, Paul urged the crew to take heart, they would make it to Rome with no loss of life. Paul’s confidence wasn’t in the crew’s skills since they had abandoned all hope, but in the God to whom he belonged and worshiped. And Paul had plenty of evidence of God's trustworthiness.

Next, he gets practical and tells everyone on board to eat. “And when he said these things, he took bread, and giving thanks to God in the presence of all he broke it and began to eat. Then they all were encouraged and ate food themselves.” (Acts 27:35‒37) You could probably feel the anxiety level decreasing with every bite of food.

I suspect that it was more Paul's thanks to God than the food that eased the anxiety on that ship. Paul knew that thankfulness soothes anxiety. While imprisoned in Rome, he wrote these well-known words to the church at Philippi: "Do not be anxious about anything, but in prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made know to God."  (Philippians 4:6) 

Often in my anxiety to make my requests known, I rush pass the "with thanksgiving" and then I have anxiety over my anxiety. What I need to do is to remember.

Remember that thankfulness soothes anxiety, especially ordinary acts such as giving thanks and breaking bread. We remember this ordinary act that echoes the extraordinarily ordinary act of the One who after giving thanks for the bread, “broke it and gave it to the disciples, and said, ‘Take, eat; this is my body.” (Matthew 26:26) Take drink, all of you, his blood for the forgiveness of sins. And then Jesus went out to face his darkest hour for us.

So, give thanks, eat, drink, remember and take heart.

After Easter by Wil Triggs

This Communion Thursday. Jesus, I am waiting for my reward. Patience has limits. The worst sins, the most abhorrent ones, are those I do not commit, the sins of my wayward brother. Those are detestable. As the faithful son who never strayed, not exactly true, but geographically accurate, I am waiting for a party of my own. I feed the calves their grain, watching them eat and gain weight. With the imaginary taste of a slice of prime rib on my mind, I wait. Jesus, help me to be patient.

Our ideas of justice, Lord, they make sense humanly speaking, but they are not right. Help us, Father, to seek and share your different way.

This Good Friday. Holy Spirit, I am waiting for what’s next in the journey of my freedom. When I started this, it was as a runaway from you and Dad. Now I’m watching the pigs eat food that’s starting to look pretty good, a vegan feast that will fill my belly for today at least. I wonder if I soaked and cooked it in water for a long time, could I chew it? In the back of my mind, I push away the question What have I done? I can’t seem to shake the image of a crown prime rib roast at the dining room table where I used to live. Spirit, be with me even here, even now. Are you next to me in the slime? If I try to make my way back, will you help?

Spirit, there is no place we can go where you are not present. Yet we forget and find ourselves in places where we need not or should not be. The journey home to you seems so far, and yet it is only a simple turning in the opposite direction and there you are, closer than anyone ever dreamed.

This Easter Saturday. Father, I am waiting for the return of my prodigal. As a dad, I realize that the child who has wandered away is ironically never far away from my heart. One out of a hundred, your son said.

Spirit, bring comfort and patience, like the coolest water melted from the snowfall above the trail line where we travel by foot, one step at a time.

This Easter.  Holy Spirit, Father, Son, I am waiting for a callback from the union of farm workers. I worked hard all day. I’m sunburned. My muscles ache. Pretty sure I stink. My hourly pay is trashed when the killjoy who shows up for the last hour is paid the same as I. When I come to work tomorrow, I’ll show up at 4:00 and see what happens. Fair is fair. This is not the way the world works, so why are you working in this way with these lazy others who barely show up at all?

Dear Jesus, though I see myself as one who works all day, help me to see that I have arrived late in the day and am not worthy of any wage at all. Shepherd to my waywardness, untangle the briars and free me from the snares in which I find myself caught. Bring me back to the family and the flock of God. Give me work and rest at the same time.

Thank you for the cinnamon rolls and coffee of Easter. Thank you for all the hands you used to make them, kneading, rolling, cutting, baking, frosting, brewing, washing, drying, giving them all away. Thank you for the voices that sang, the hands that played, the voice that preached, the ears that heard, for the greeters and ushers and all who served. Every one a pixel of blue in the five white banners blowing in the wind, spelling out the name above all others.

Easter Monday. Back to a normal work week. 

Jesus, you are not like me. 
I am not like you. 
You became like me 
so I can become like you. 
You tasted the hell of my sin 
so that I might dine with you in heaven. 
This seems impossible, 
for you to do all that and for me to experience any change at all. 
Yet here we are, just a day after Easter and the change has already begun. 
I do not work as you do. The world does not work as you do. 
But good news means you work and never stop working to give rest. 
Your way is better.
Help this finite creature move against his old will
With new resolve, turning, yearning, learning
Scaling this heavenly hill to the eternally loving you.

Easter Unexpected by Lorraine Triggs

Perhaps the only thing predictable about grief is its unpredictable nature. We grieve loss—be it the death of someone we love or the death of a relationship or dream—differently, and there’s no right way to grieve or even a statute of limitations on grief.
 
My childhood home of two bedrooms/one bath didn't afford my mother much private space for mourning my father's death, which was why her sobs one night startled my sisters and me. We had never heard her cry like that before—heart-wrenching, inconsolable sobs. The three of us ran to her room, piled on her bed and joined in her tears. We eventually fell asleep, a bit better prepared for the next teary mess that would come, unexpected, but come, nonetheless.
 
Even though Jesus clearly told his disciples that he would suffer, be rejected, killed, and would rise after three days, they weren’t prepared for Jesus’ painful cry, “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?” (Mark 9:33) They were not prepared for his brutal and very real death. Yet, in this messiness of mockery, denial, daytime darkness and bloody death, the unexpected began to happen because he who knew no sin became sin for us. 

Then there's the unexpected witness of the centurion, who stood watching Jesus, recognition dawning on him that “Truly this man was the Son of God!” (Mark 15:39). There are women looking on at all this from a distance, when two of them, Mary Magdalene and Mary the mother of James the younger and of Joses, decided to trail Joseph of Arimathea to see where he laid Jesus. 
 
Not unexpectedly, the two Marys headed home. That Saturday, they navigated their grief by preparing spices and ointment for Jesus’ body, and then by keeping the Sabbath. Their only expectation as they walked to the tomb on the first day of the week was wondering who would roll away the stone from the tomb’s entrance.
 
Fortunately for them, someone had already rolled it away—and Easter came, unexpected.

I’d like to imagine that spices and ointment went every which way when the two angels asked, “Why do you seek the living among the dead? He is not here but has risen.” I also think that grief and despair went every which way as the women went from fear to trembling to astonishment that Jesus had risen just as he had told them.
 
Death is expected at the end of life, but death comes with an unexpected statute of limitations. It's called resurrection, here and now and forevermore.

In his book The Heart in Pilgrimage, A Treasure of Classic Devotionals on the Christian Life, Leland Ryken includes a devotional by British author, artist and missionary Lilias Trotter titled, "Death Is the Gate of Life." Writes Trotter:

"Yes, life is the uppermost, resurrection life, radiant and joyful and strong, for we represent down here Him who liveth and was dead and is alive for evermore. . . . A gateway is never a dwelling-place; the death-stage is never meant for our souls to stay and brood over, but to pass through with a will into the light beyond . . . , for above all and through all is the inflowing, overflowing life of Jesus. . . . He is not a God of the dead, but a God of the living, and He would have us let the glory of His gladness shine out."

He is risen indeed.

Parade of Faith by Wil Triggs

After the raising of Lazarus, imagine how word must have spread. Jesus was no huckster, no magician. Lazarus was really dead—dead and buried for four days. Then Jesus came and called Lazarus out of the grave. He obeyed.
 
Communication networks in the time of Jesus were not as sophisticated as our media, social platforms and digital outlets. Yet word got around. Quickly.
 
Jesus, the man who raised Lazarus from the dead, the one who fed thousands multiple times, he’s coming here, to Jerusalem.
 
Who doesn’t want to come and see his arrival.
 
And so, the crowd unfolded and grew. Palm branches waving. Coats thrown on the ground in a frenzied worship. And yet it was not as we might have imagined, a humble man, riding on a donkey.
 
Ride on, ride on in majesty!
Hear all the tribes hosanna cry;
O Savior meek, pursue Your road
with palms and scattered garments strowed.
 
Perpetua, a pregnant slave in second-century Rome, had come to faith in Jesus and was sentenced to death. but the spectacle of her execution was delayed due to her pregnancy. After she gave birth to her child, she was paraded into the Coliseum with two other women of faith also condemned to death. She was the first of the three women to be wounded. The crowd cheered. A bull released to finish the job of her death mysteriously would not attack, so gladiators had to do the killing. Before her execution, guards asked her about being killed so soon after the birth of her only child. She answered: “When I face the beasts there will be another who lives in me, and will suffer for me since I will be suffering for him.” A Christian family adopted her infant.
 
Ride on, ride on in majesty!
In lowly pomp ride on to die.
O Christ, Your triumphs now begin
o’er captive death and conquered sin.
 
In 1555, John Rogers was paraded to his place of execution in London. Though he petitioned for chances to visit with family members during this incarceration, such requests were rejected. His children were among the crowd as they followed him to the place of death. Here is part of the exchange he had with his executioner:
“Will you revoke your evil opinions of the Sacrament?”
“That which I have preached I will seal with my blood.”
“You are a heretic then.”
“That shall be known at the day of judgment.”
“I will never pray for you.”
“But I will pray for you,” Rogers answered, just moments before he was engulfed by flames.
 
Ride on, ride on in majesty!
The host of angels in the sky
look down with sad and wond’ring eyes
to see th’approaching Sacrifice.
 
When Ahmed decided to follow Christ in the 1990s, his Hindu family rejected him. But he devoted himself to the church and to sharing the gospel with his Hindu neighbors. During Ramadan he gave away the gospel on audiocassette and then began to leave the media in public places for people to take. As his ministry has grown, Ahmed has become a target, so he moved his family around often for protection. His family moved 185 times from 2000 to 2019. Things have calmed down, but he says “In the Bible, when persecution comes, the ministry grows. …If there is persecution, I can face it. …I wish to see great transformation among the Kashmiri people. If I am killed, I will have fought a good fight. I will have run a good race.”
 
Ride on, ride on in majesty!
Your last and fiercest strife is nigh.
The Father on His sapphire throne
awaits His own anointed Son.
 
This report from this week’s Prayer for the Persecuted Church prayer sheet:
Anisha and Ashish, who married early in 2023, went to a local church in search of healing from demonic spirits that harassed Ashish. Church members prayed for them, and Ashish was healed. The newlyweds began to read the Bible they had received at the church and soon wanted to place their trust in Jesus Christ. When Ashish’s parents found the Bible, they insisted that the young couple renounce Christ and stop going to church. Ashish agreed, but Anisha did not. She was forced to leave the home without money for food or shelter, so the local church helped her with basic needs. Soon, Ashish decided to join her again. Now Anisha asks for prayer for the strengthening of her husband’s faith and that they would together stand firm and be witnesses for Christ in their families. They are currently considering attending a training program to grow in their knowledge of the Bible.
 
Let's ride on, ride on in majesty in this parade of palms, casting down our cloaks onto the ground where the humble King rides. Let us live in sacrifice and service in our parade of faith.

Out of Focus by Wil Triggs

I’m curious about people. Maybe sometimes nosy. I want to know what others think. I’m not always sure what I think about a particular issue, but even at that, I like to see what polls say other people think. I don't mean all those political polls. I mean regular life stuff and church stuff. What do other people think? So, I recently visited the Barna website, which I often do in the beginning months of the year to see what they have to say about the year just ended. Sure enough, they had a summary of their top releases of 2023.

Here are a few bits from my study of their site.

On the negative side, Barna reports, “The share of practicing Christians has nearly dropped in half since 2000.” That sounds pretty bad. But they go on to suggest, “Though the trajectory of Christian commitment in the U.S. has been on a downward slide and is in need of urgent interventions, our new data give Christian leaders cause for hope.”

• Curiosity about Jesus among teens is high.

• A desire to grow spiritually is high across all generations.

• Jesus also does well, with a high percentage of people saying they have a high opinion of both Jesus and the Bible.

So far so good. Until I come to this:

Our data on the rising spiritual openness in America reveals a tremendous opportunity for faith leaders. The challenge facing the Church is whether they are ready and able to meet the spiritually open—where they are, as they are. “The work of Christians is to embody Jesus—full of truth and grace—and reflect his image in all they say and do,” says David Kinnaman, CEO of Barna Group. “The data shows they too often fall short.”

The website reports that the church is viewed much less favorably than either Jesus, the Bible or the hunger for spiritual growth. In some ways, there’s no surprise there. I love the church, but even I might rank the church at large in a less positive light than the Savior and his Word.

Still, we could do better, and I like to tell myself that College Church is doing better than churches who make their way into the news media. Our biggest press coverage ever was when that tornadic storm bent one of our steeples like it was a toothpick. May that be the only time College Church ends up on the front page of a newspaper.

God uses people to accomplish things on earth, so I’d like to think the polling about church could go a little higher. Or at least that a survey in our community would see our churches in a more positive light.

These kinds of questions and answers have been around for a lot longer than most people realize.  In an attempt to better understand the trends of the times and shared felt needs, imagine a recent archeological effort uncovered an ancient artifact. Here are some translated highlights.

Congratulations on crossing the threshold into the knowledge of good and evil. Please take just a few quick minutes to answer our three-question survey so we can better understand what you have just experienced.

1. Describe how you felt after biting into the fruit:

A. Relief that I’m not dead. I guess the serpent was right after all.

B. Don’t look at me; it’s his/her fault.

C. I’m in a mood and it’s not good. That’s new at least.

2. What did you think when you became aware of good and evil?

A. Evil is a concept that I can overcome, but good is everywhere.

B. Now it’s up to me and a healthy dose of self-care.

C. I wondered where all the dandelions came from overnight.

3. What about, you know, the naked thing?

A. I’m comfortable in my designer fig leaves, no problem.

B. I said to myself, “Does this come in black?”

C. I do my best not to think about it. We have a world to run. So, let’s get on with it.

Surveys are valid and helpful, but I can’t help thinking that when we look at ourselves and each other, we’re missing out. We're looking at the wrong place. There are other things to survey.

I lift up my eyes to the hills.

    From where does my help come?

My help comes from the LORD,

    who made heaven and earth. (Psalm 121:1, 2)

So much time and energy spent on analyzing ourselves and one another, not just in surveys, but in the media—print, blogs, podcasts, our Christian media. Real help comes when we lift our eyes up and survey the hills.

Survey the hill Isaac walked up with the dry wood strapped to his back.
Survey the holy-ground hill where Moses removed his shoes.
Survey the hill where the cross stood. Survey the hill where the tomb was empty.
Survey the hill where Jesus ascended into heaven, and the people stood looking up at the sky until an angel told them to snap out of it.

How can we turn our eyes from the manifold expressions and study of humanity to the wonders of God himself, our beautiful Maker, Savior, Shepherd, Rescuer, Friend?

We don’t deserve his love, yet here it is, ever present, deeper, richer, fuller complete. How can we devote ourselves and our time more fully to him? Consider God’s love. Just take the time, even if just a few moments, to stop and think, not about self or nation or world. Where do our hearts focus? Consider today this suggestion from John Owen.

“…if your heart is taken up with the Father’s love as the chief property of his nature, it cannot help but choose to be overpowered, conquered, embraced by him. This, if anything, will arouse our desire to make our eternal home with God. If the love of a father will not make a child delight in him, what will? So do this: set your thoughts on the eternal love of the Father and see if your heart is not aroused to delight in him. Sit down for a while at this delightful spring of living water and you will soon find its streams sweet and delightful. You who used to run from God will not now be able, even for a second, to keep at any distance from him.”

It's Lonely at the Bottom by Lorraine Triggs

I had convinced myself that I was the only mother at church whose adult child wasn’t working, following the Lord, dating a wonderful Christian, or moving into his first home. At Good Friday services, forget contemplating the cross shrouded in black cloth, all I contemplated were happy parents surrounded by equally happy adult children, accentuating my aloneness. It was lonely at the bottom.

According to a guest essay in the New York Times, it turns out that I wasn’t special in my loneliness. The essay, titled, “If Loneliness Is an Epidemic, How Do We Treat It?” (Eleanor Cummins and Andrew Zaleski, July 14, 2023) stated that one-fifth of Americans over 18 always feel lonely or socially isolated.

If loneliness is an epidemic, then it can be treated as a clinical problem. Behavioral neuroscientist Dr. Stephanie Cacioppo (no stranger to loneliness herself), has been moving away from investigating a “pharmaceutical solution” to loneliness and, according to the essay, is “now promoting the acronym [are you ready for this?] GRACE, which stands for ‘gratitude, reciprocity, altruism, choice and enjoyment.’”

As Christ followers, GRACE spells out a different solution to loneliness which is long past the epidemic stage. I suspect it began in the beginning in the garden when our first parents experienced dissonance in their communication with the Creator. And Grace shows up with promises and fig leaves.

Ruth was a swirl of emotions—loneliness probably in the mix—when she threw in her lot with her bitter and lonely mother-in-law. There, Grace shows up in worthy Boaz, turns bitterness to blessing and then enters the kingly line of David.

Even King David wasn’t immune to loneliness and despair. In Psalm 6, he languishes, his bones and soul are not just troubled but greatly troubled. He starts to see Grace but is overwhelmed and exhausted with his moaning, tears and weeping. Ah, a perfect backdrop for Grace who shows up in the darkness and night as if they were bright as day and hears David’s cries and prayers.

After David and after 400 years of silence, Grace shows up again, this time in bodily form, as the only Son from the Father. I don’t know if this is what Dr. Cacioppo had in mind when she suggested that a lonely mind might be healed with help from the body, but we are healed because the Son’s body was broken for us, because his wounds brought healing to our souls, because his body was raised.

God’s redemptive, healing Grace also shows up in body that breaks bread together, that thanks God together, that does “nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility counts others more significant than yourselves” (Philippians 2:3) and looks to the interests of others.

A funny thing happened to me at the bottom of my loneliness. When my husband told our small group about some of the issues with our adult child, it turned out that everyone in our group had someone they loved with the same issues. Suddenly it was very crowded at the bottom as we cried together, prayed together and made room for Grace, make that more grace, ever even more and more grace as we lifted up each other and found rest in the One who was lifted up for us.

Get Better by Wil Triggs

A couple weeks back we taught the Kindergarteners from Acts 5, Annanias and Sapphira. The curriculum went off in the direction of generosity, but we couldn’t really do that. The two of them had lied.
 
I don’t remember the specific incident that took place in my grade school class, but to my mind, it was so horrible that I absolutely could not go to school the next day. Was it a threat from a schoolmate? A test I wasn’t ready for? I don’t remember, but I was convinced that It must not happen. I prayed that I would wake up sick.
 
In the morning, I convinced myself that my prayer was answered.
 
“I feel sick,” I said to my mom.
 
She had a full-time job. My older brother was the only other sibling in the house, but he was a letter carrier and had left for work hours before. My dad was gone. It was just me and her. I had no idea the stress my being sick caused my mom. I didn’t care. I was focused on not going to school.
 
My mom put her hand on my forehead. She held it there. “You don’t feel like you have a fever,” she said. I remember thinking she didn't sound too sure about that.
 
She paused, touched my forehead again, left the room and returned with the thermometer. She shook it and checked the mercury to be sure it was down where it needed to be, then put it in my mouth, under my tongue. Mom left me there on the couch and went into the other room to continue getting ready for work.
 
As soon as she left the room, I took the thermometer out of my mouth and peered at it. You had to turn it just right to read and I couldn’t do it, but I knew that thermometer had to go higher than normal.
 
I glanced at the lamp by the couch. Well, was I going to try it or not? No, I shouldn’t, but soon it would be time to go. Quickly, the thermometer touched the lightbulb. I wasn’t sure how long to hold it there. I took it off and tried again to read it. No luck. I put it back on the light snd heard her coming. I didn't want to burn my tongue, but hearing her footsteps, the thermometer jumped back in my mouth.
 
Mom took the thermometer out of my mouth. She looked at it, looked at me, felt my forehead, then said, “You can’t go to school today. You need to stay home and get better.”
 
Phew. What a relief.

She figured out my lunch and made sure I was comfortable on the couch in the living room in front of the television. I lied there, my head on the pillow she brought and allowed her to drape a blanket over me.
 
 “Don’t answer the door if anyone comes. Call me on the phone if you need anything. Your brother will be home first.”
 
“I know,” I answered, convincing myself that I must really be sick, my voice slightly trembling.
 
She kissed me goodbye and headed off to work.
 
The morning went well. I watched TV shows I usually only saw on holidays. Lunch was canned chicken soup with saltines and an orange. Even at that age, I could boil water, so there was tea with sugar, which was what I always drank when I felt sick or cold or sometimes just because.
 
But as the afternoon came, gameshows were replaced by soap operas. I wasn’t interested, so I turned off the television. I started to think about what I had done.
 
My brother came home. He had things he wanted to watch on television, so I went to my room. I had a book to read, but it wasn’t any good trying to read my way into someplace else.
 
Whatever it was that I avoided at school that day was still going to be there the day after, and now I had to face it with the added layer that I lied to my mom and would have schoolwork to make up. It would have been over if I had gone to school, but I did feel sick. I kept trying to convince myself, but it was not the kind of sick that had anything to do with staying home from school to get better. The kind of sick that couldn’t be healed with soup and rest. I had lied to my mom. Lying was wrong. I was wrong.

This was worse than whatever I was trying to avoid at school. The bad thing wasn’t at school. It stayed home with me. There was no escape. When you pretend to be sick and aren’t really, there’s no way to get better on your own.
 
I prayed. I asked Jesus to forgive me.
 
My bedroom was in the back of the house right by the driveway, so I could hear the car pull in and mom open the car door. A few seconds later I heard her unlock the back door and step into the back entry, then into the kitchen.
 
She came to my room. “How are you feeling?” she asked.
 
“Better,” I said, lying again. “Mom…”
 
“What?”
 
“I didn’t really have a fever.”
 
“I know.”
 
“You did?”
 
“That thermometer was so hot you would have been dead or in the hospital, and I certainly would have been able to feel a fever that high.”
 
“But you let me stay home.”
 
“I figured if you wanted to stay home that bad, you shouldn’t go to school.” She hugged me. “But don’t ever do that again.”
 
I hugged her back. “I won’t,” I said. She asked me what I had done to get the thermometer so hot. I told her. Someone had told me about the light bulb trick at school.
 
I never did that again.
 
Would she have let me stay home if I had told her why I didn’t want to go? Possibly. And I would have had a much better afternoon. Long forgotten was the potential incident that made me want to stay home—but, here I am now all these decades later remembering the bad choice I made.
 
Whatever I feared at school was not as bad as what I did at home to avoid it. There is no pulling the wool over the eyes of God. Like my mother on that day, the Lord Jesus already knows.
 
Annanias and Saphirra lied to Peter to make them look better than they really were. I lied to my mom to make myself look worse than I was. God is not fooled either way. Lies are childish things. Grace and truth are the medicines that makes us get better.

For from his fullness we have all received, grace upon grace. For the law was given through Moses; grace and truth came through Jesus Christ. John 1:16, 17

Ashes to Ashes by Lorraine Triggs

Ash Wednesday collided with Valentine’s Day this week. It has probably happened before, but as a junior higher, I was too busy exchanging Valentines and conversational candy hearts to notice. If I did notice anything on Ash Wednesday it was my friend’s excused tardiness to school and the smudge on her forehead.

“Why do you have a smudge on your forehead?” I asked.

“It’s not a smudge. It’s a cross from the priest,” she explained. “It’s Ash Wednesday.”

This was not a day on my Baptist church’s calendar. “Ash what?”

“Ash Wednesday. You know, the beginning of Lent.” Not on the calendar either nor did my friend elaborate much. “For 40 days before Easter, you eat fish, not meat, and give up candy.”

When I asked my mom about this apparent gap in my Christian upbringing, she replied, “We’re Baptists. We don’t do that.”  Since I liked candy and didn’t like fish, I was relieved that we Baptists didn’t do Ash Wednesday or Lent.

On Thursday, my friend would come to school smudge-free, and life went on as usual at Helen Keller Junior High.

In college, when Ash Wednesday became a thing among evangelicals, I had friends who pulled back their hair to make sure everyone noticed the ashes on their foreheads. Another apparent gap in my Christian upbringing that Lent was a season of show and tell. Or maybe my friends simply forgot what the priest said when placing the ashes on their foreheads; “Remember that you are dust and to dust you shall return.”

I know better now that neither my junior high friend nor I—and not even my ash-proud friends—could ever make ourselves smudge-free. Sin leaves its smudges and prints on our hearts, turning lives into ashes, and returning us to dust, to death.

Perhaps the practice of giving up something for Lent (and I hope more than candy or meat by now) is to make Jesus’ death on the Cross more relatable or to satisfy that impulse of ours to do something for our salvation. But how can we relate to the Cross, when it was Jesus, who knew no sin, was made sin for us? What Lenten sacrifice of mine will add to the lavish grace and mercy God showed us in Christ?

English Nonconformist Isaac Watts may or may not have shared my inclination of answering rhetorical questions, but he did, however unintentionally, this once when he wrote “When I Survey the Wondrous Cross.”

When I survey the wondrous cross
On which the Prince of glory died,
My richest gain I count but loss,
And pour contempt on all my pride.

Forbid it, Lord, that I should boast,
Save in the death of Christ my God!
All the vain things that charm me most,
I sacrifice them to His blood.

See from His head, His hands, His feet,
Sorrow and love flow mingled down!
Did e’er such love and sorrow meet,
Or thorns compose so rich a crown?

Were the whole realm of nature mine,
That were a present far too small;
Love so amazing, so divine,
Demands my soul, my life, my all.

It’s not only the 40 days leading up to Easter that we should survey the wondrous cross but also the other 325 days of the year, overwhelmed with thankfulness that we who were dead, left in the dust, were made alive in Christ.